How do you feel when you play your best golf?
I started thinking about this long before I ever considered writing a blog. For me, good golf transcends the physical and is almost spiritual. My best golf has been like an out-of-body experience. My mind has been quiet and I've felt connected to something greater than me. It's almost as if an otherworldly force has been guiding me. I've got Old Tom Morris controlling my body and Seve whispering tactics and motivations in my ear. When get into that state, everything is easy and otherworldly. The shots just happen and never feel forced. It might only last a few holes, but occasionally it's there for the whole round. Whenever it occurs I want to stay in that place forever. Calm, confident and grateful. At peace with the world. At one with golf!
It's not like I suddenly had Rory McIlroy's long game and Luke Donald's short game, but I was getting more out of my own game and I was in "the zone". Having experienced it a few times, I'm left wondering how to get back to that mindset more often.
Get connected - smell the divot!
I think you need a combination of expectation management, perspective, awareness, patience and gratitude. As my golf skills have improved, there have been times when I've allowed my expectations to get too high and subsequently been annoyed or disappointed with myself when I didn't achieve those new standards. Rather than enjoy and remember the good shots, I've focussed on the bad ones and subjected myself to some pretty poor self-talk. I've been a long way from that transcendent state on those days!
I've skirted around the subject before and while I know it's evolutionary biology and our natural survival instinct to focus on mistakes, it certainly doesn't help with golf! The Stoic philosopher Epictetus said, "When we give things outside our control too much importance, then frustration is certain. If we focus more on what truly depends on us, then there isn't much that can make us angry".
Yes, I want to improve. Yes, I want to shoot lower scores. But more importantly, I want to enjoy myself when playing. Golf is my hobby. I play it for leisure and I pay for the privilege. The clues are in the words "game" and "playing". It shouldn't feel like a chore and it certainly shouldn't feel like work! But I am getting better at this. As daft as it may sound, occasionally smelling the divot before replacing it has helped me with awareness and gratitude when playing.
As well as the Epictetus quote above, Stoicism has taught me about momento mori, or the reminder that time is a gift. It's another recurring blog theme and why I have the skull and crossbones stamp for my golf balls. Every second spent is gone forever and we can not get it back. One day we will run out of time, so how do we want to spend it? If you've not read "Scratch Attitude" by Kent Osborne, I urge you to do so. He would advocate asking yourself "If this was the last round of golf you ever get to play, then how would you like to remember it". Do you want to remember the company you had, the fresh air, the great drive on 6, the birdie on 14, the views, the smell of the divot? Or do you want to dwell on the missed putts and poor shots? I know what I have chosen to do!
The transcendent golfer
With that in mind, I've taken Kent's advice and started a golf journal. I've called it The Transcendent Golfer's Journal (but any ordinary notebook will do!). Before I leave the house to play golf I plan to ask myself three questions:
What am I grateful for today?
What do I love about golf/life?
If this was my last round of golf/day on earth, how would I want to experience it?
When I return home I intend to add some additional information about the round:
What did I enjoy most about my round today?
My (2 or 3) best holes
My best par 3's
My best shots
Drive
Fairway wood/hybrid
Irons
Short game
Putts
It's not about paralysis by analysis, it's about connecting with how I felt and hopefully getting back to that transcendental state more often. While the Tangent app helps me identify where I can improve technically, this is about improving my attitude and mentality to become a better golfer, rather than just getting better at golf.
It should take no more than 5 or 10 minutes to write and it's about focusing on and reinforcing the positives from the round. Like Pia Nilsson and Vision54, did I pay attention to the intention I left the house with? Was I present? Did I remain aware of my surroundings? How did I feel when I hit a good shot? I've tried using a daily gratitude journal before, but I let the discipline slip when the book finished! This one comes with a different motivation, so hopefully it will be easier to keep it up.
Finally, watching the recent Alfred Dunhill Links Championship and listening to the celebrities and professionals being interviewed was a great reminder that golf is about so much more than just hitting a ball. It truly transcends the physical if you let it.
Further reading (three of many):
"Scratch Attitude" by Kent Osborne
"Golf in the Kingdom" by Michael Murphy
"Final Rounds" by James Dodson
Perhaps it might be a good idea to let you know who's sending this message. My name is Dick Spong and I live in Palm Harbor, FL. Graham lives nearby in Dunedin and we've been friends for years, both enjoying the challenge of chasing that little white ball around. However, my perspective is a little different. I swing from the other side and have been active in left-handed golf for many years. Either way, isn't it a great game!
My wife and I had dinner with your brother Graham and his wife last Saturday evening and he mentioned your golf-related blog. Being a golfer, I expressed an interest, so here I am and look forward to reading your thoughts and comments from your prospective. I was able to attend the 150th Open at St. Andrews a couple of years ago. What an honor and a privilege to be able to attend that event at the Home of Golf! Let's stay in touch.