Book review - The Subtle Art - must read!

This is the first audiobook I've ever listened to. I've owned the hard copy for a long time, but I just never seemed to get around to reading it. It's one of the many layers in my leaning tower of books. When I saw it was available on Spotify, I thought going on holiday was the perfect opportunity to get started. Maybe audiobooks are the way to finally tackle my backlog of books (or maybe it needs more holidays).

Don't be fooled by the title or the garish cover, this is a serious book, but it's written in a style that makes its messages very accessible. Of all the philosophy books I've read lately, this is definitely one of the best. While it's not explicitly about Stoicism, I feel it addresses many of the concepts of Stoicism really well. After all, the main aim of Stoicism is to "live a good life", so anything purporting to help you with that is going in the same direction. It also brings in many of the concepts of Buddhism too and highlights how similar it is to Stoicism. But this is about Mark Manson and his own philosophy, which is drawn from many different influences. Everybody can get something from this book.

The "art" is not about having a blatant disregard for everything and everyone, but about carefully choosing what you actually do want to give a fuck about. Touching on the concept of memento mori, we have limited time on this earth, so don't waste your time getting hot and bothered about things that really don't matter! If I were to re-write the book I'd maybe start with the last chapter about death, as addressing that earlier could contextualise everything else in the book differently.

Another of the central themes is that we don't get to choose what happens to us in life but we do get to choose how we react. That's Stoicism 101 right there! Life is comprised of failure, loss, regrets and death. You have to get comfortable that life will throw nasty stuff at you but you have to be able to take it and let go. Don't blame others. Take responsibility for how you react. He is very concerned about "entitlement culture" and people who see themselves as "victims". Again, he quotes Buddha, "Pain and loss are inevitable, so let go of trying to resist them".

I also like the sections on choosing your values carefully but being prepared to challenge them and admit you can be wrong. If you never admit you're wrong then you can never grow. We are all a constant work in progress, You are defined by what you are prepared to struggle for. He advocates for honest self-questioning arguing that the more awkward the answer, the closer to the truth it likely is. Examples of good values would be things that are reality-based, socially constructive and within our control. Poor values would be based on superstition, be socially destructive and be out of our own control.

Once I got started on this book I had to listen at every opportunity I got, keen to get to the next chapter. I've thoroughly enjoyed it and can see myself returning to it in the future. I've taken copious notes as I went through it and will dip back into certain sections, especially the chapters about values and also the hedonic treadmill (an old favourite topic of mine!). The book has also introduced some areas that I want to explore further. Alan Watts backwards law, where he says, “When you try to stay on the surface of the water, you sink; but when you try to sink, you float’ and that ‘insecurity is the result of trying to be secure.” This has the Tao Te Ching and Zen Buddhism at its heart. Albert Camus, who said, "You will never live if you are searching for the meaning of life".

There was much I could relate to in this book and it helped identify drivers behind some of the big changes in my life. I was definitely headed down a path of entitlement until external events gave me a shake and made me reassess my values. As Oscar Wilde may have recommended, I removed the portrait of Dorian Grey from the attic and brought it into the light. As Mark recommends, I will continue to challenge myself in future.

When you read the section about the Cape of Good Hope then you'll understand the picture